Thursday, 27 October 2016

It's been over a month

Since my last post.

I feel kind of ashamed that I am not posting regularly. I visit often, I read the blogs on my blog list but for one reason or another haven't felt inclined to post here.

Why is that? 

Well it isn't because I have stopped being Master's slave. No matter how vanilla our lives are, I am still His collared slave.  He welcomes my input into how our life together runs, but is always in control and in charge. 

To be honest there isn't much kink, but that is mainly because we have been so busy. We have been working together to get my house ready for the sale and then last week we were on a much needed holiday which we spent staying on a narrow boat. 

We intend to get the kinky side of our relationship back on track soon. But we have more painting and sorting out to do yet. We can see the light at the end of the tunnel, but it still seems to be far in the distance.

Master suggested I should post more of our everyday life here while we are getting the kinky side back on track.

Maybe, just maybe that is the answer.

Meantime. this:

His photo of me, altered on his photography app. This is quite cute don't you think?

Wednesday, 21 September 2016


Do you ever think you see something or someone in your sightline, turn around and realise that the thing or person is not there?

Just part of your imagination?

Perhaps a shadow.

A shadow of the person you were, of a person you knew and loved but who is now gone? A pet that you owned and is also gone?

I often stand in my kitchen, and think I see someone or something outside in the front garden. Afterwards I realise it was a shadow, caused by the way the sun moved across the garden rather than ever quite shining in. It is to do with the way the house is positioned and I know this.

But from time to time I have imagined I briefly witnessed the cat run across the garden, or someone walk down my garden path. But they are not real animals or people, they are shadows.

The cat died 4 or 5 years ago and people who I am not expecting rarely turn up these days, unless they are trying to sell something. Perhaps double glazing or religion.

But actually I like to imagine the ghosts of those lost are around me. Tribbles the cat (named by my son and often out of the house and seeking to come in) who died while his Master was away at university in the USA.  My much loved nan who died 17 years ago and who I swear after she was gone made some of my son's toys make their electronic noise out of the blue.

Most recently my dad, who died two years ago next week.

Sometimes when I turn around I think I see him walking up the path. In the area because he has been to fit an outside light at someone's house,  to put in a socket or 5 (he was an electrician) and who is hoping for a cup of coffee, a biscuit and a chat.

But sadly they are all shadows.

Or maybe not so sadly since those shadows bring the memories to the fore and that can't be either a bad or scary thing. They are the shadows of our lives gone by, our memories and perhaps also of memories to be made in the future. They are something to be valued and enjoyed. Not a very wicked Wednesday, but one from the heart.

Tuesday, 20 September 2016

As time goes by..........

Saturday, 10 September 2016

The shorter the better

So Kink of the Week for 1-15 September is Hair. Having covered pubic hair already, the focus this time is the hair on your head.

Master has a particular fetish for very short hair. In his ideal world his slave would have her head shaved. For him, there is something very erotic about a woman whose head is shaved. I haven't asked him, but suspect he prefers that the hair has visibly been cropped closely and that you can run your hands over it and feel the stubble rather than a head that is truly bald. His tumblr feed is full of photos of women that emulate his ideal (he has other kinks that he displays too unsurprisingly).

Master is not one to push a slave to comply with his wishes, at least not overtly. He would prefer that she does so to please him and because she wants it too. So the move towards short hair has been a gradual process. 

When we met my hair was shoulder length. It had taken me a while to grow my hair to a length that I liked and I felt pretty happy with the style. As far as I was concerned I dressed and had my hair cut in a way that I wanted, to please myself, no one else. When we met, his then slave told me of his preference for shorter hair. She told me that when she arrived to live with him, he would force her to have her head shaved. This was something she said she would struggle with. While I believe he may have said such a thing to her, I don't actually believe he would do anything like that without the other person (even his slave) fully agreeing and wanting that to be the case. Certainly he hasn't pressured me to cut my hair. But the things she told me stick in my mind and maybe stop me from going the whole hog. 

I have though, over the past 2 1/2 years gradually cut my hair shorter. 

I have discovered that a woman of my age looks better with shorter hair. That I like the way I look with short hair. It looks better when cut around my ears than trying the half way thing. I have discovered that for a woman going through the menopause short hair really helps you cool down. I think it helps me and others see the bone structure of my face.

What is more, I have been complimented on my hair in a way that I don't think I have been for many years by family, friends, colleagues and by almost complete strangers.

I don't have my head shaved and am not sure I ever will. Maybe I might get the area around my ears shaved as I think it looks cool and pretty sexy. I know what Master likes, but don't think he will push me to do something I don't want. 

But sometimes you need another persons view, another's ideal to help push those boundaries. without Master I may never have cut my hair to the length it is now and may never have known just how good it would look.

Short is good. For him, the shorter the better and maybe I am edging closer to his ideal.

Friday, 2 September 2016

Friends and much more

Last year HornyGeekGirl started a meme, I stumbled upon it and some where along the line got confused and thought it was new. The prompt is above and I have written the post so its getting posted, better late than never!. I have to say that I love the quote (going to have to find out more about the author) and also the banner on which it sits - beautiful scene of wild flowers......


It wasn't the first time I had arranged to meet a man previously only known to me on the internet. But this was different:

  • We hadn't even spoken on the phone.
  • I didn't know his first name until I asked him for it the night before.
  • He lived more locally than the previous encounter and therefore I must have known that there were more possibilities open to me.
  • I knew he was involved with someone else, though had little idea at the time of what their relationship was about.
  • I thought I knew about BDSM, about D/s. It turned out that I was about to find out much much more. 

I was nervous, I expect he was too though we haven't discussed that. What was clear to us both was there was something of a sexual spark between us which emerged during the time it took for us to consume one drink. I expect I spoke quickly and said too much, he was a good listener. As we finished our drinks, he suggested a walk.

It was cool and damp out, but not unpleasant and fresh air seemed a good idea. He took my hand and I felt the buzz of electricity between us. Soon after we stood in a churchyard and kissed for the first time, he touched me outside of my clothes. I throbbed for him. My life had inextricably changed in those few moments even if I didn't know it yet. 

Looking back on the past 2 years and 7 months I can see that I have changed as a person, that I am happier, more self fulfilled, more confident in myself as a woman and as a sexual being. I am his slut, his bitch and his slave. But also I am his friend and he is mine. We have a relationship based on openness and trust. The dynamic requires it but so does the relationship itself. I love this man, my best friend, my lover, My Master. 

Thursday, 1 September 2016


At the beginning of the year I decided that this would be the one where I sorted out things in the marital home and got it ready to sell. I spent time decluttering, but as the spring turned to summer very little of any significance happened. We went on holiday and had the most amazing time, we returned and we had something of a busy social life with nights out and weekends away. Suddenly it was August and we wondered where the year had gone. 

For Master it has been the same, he said at the beginning of the year that he would refurbish his bathroom; we even went to a bathroom shop to take a look. He chose the one he wanted. He said he needed to declutter, ready for me to move in. The months passed, we made a couple of trips to the recycling centre and I helped with getting rid of some of the clutter - sometimes a person needs another to be assertive, even if they are their slave. But then life got busy;  holidays, nights out, weekends away. Then it was August.

During all of this something happened to the kink and overt signs of our M/s dynamic. We settled into a lovely routine, always had good sex, though less frequently perhaps than before. We were comfortable in our life, no problems, just not really kinky. Then it was August.

Finally in August we rediscovered our mojo for getting things done and also for our dynamic. We realised we needed to make an effort and to get things done. We also realised that relationships of all kinds must be worked at. 

Today it is September, I can look back on August with pleasure and say we have had fun, but we have also got things done. I have cleared out the garden and am well on the way to being happy with what I see when I look outside of the window. I have started to get rid of things inside, and have begun to plan what I should keep and what should go. Master has been working on his house too, he has designed his bathroom though hasn't quite as far as ordering it, yet. We have begun to discuss clearing his garage so I can store some things there after I move out of here. Today I have taken a day off and we will finish off repairing my shed and painting the fence, among other fun things.

Best of all we have revitalised the kink. There has been naked kneeling, CMNF evenings in the house, I have some kinky new things to wear and there is a sign of a task or two to come. We are still to get out to a club for play, and indeed haven't played at home for a while. But he is clearly exerting his Master status over me his slave and I am happily getting on with being the best slave I can be.

As we move towards autumn I feel confident that we have a balance and are moving in the right direction. 

Tuesday, 30 August 2016

TMI Tuesday - 30th August 2016

It’s the last TMI Tuesday for the month of August. Did you know August was originally named Sextilis (‘sixth’). In 8 B.C. Sextilis was renamed August in honor of Roman Emperor Augustus. BTW…August or Sextilis was the sixth month of the year in the ancient Roman 10-month calendar.

Now for more about August:
1. In the Philippines today is National Heroes Day. Who is your hero? (You can name up to 3). Why?
The only person who I could call my hero right now is Master. He has helped me find the most important things in life and is busy assisting me in getting myself into a position so we can live together. Right now I don't need anything extra.
2. August is Romance Awareness Month. What have you done to enhance romance in your life? Or what have you become aware of or discovered with regards to romance?
After our holiday to Sicily we realised we needed to get our M/s and kinky selves back on track. The holiday was wonderful, but very busy. Added to that we are in the process of getting my house ready to sell and his for me to be able to live with him in. We spend some of our time reconnecting each week and that helps the romantic side of our life too.
3. In the month of August there is National Raspberry Creme Day, National Ice Cream Sandwich Day, and National Chocolate Chip Cookie Day. Which day are you most likely to celebrate and how would you celebrate?
I really eat very few puddings / sweets / ice creams right now since I am trying to lose weight. But if pushed I would go for the Raspberry cream. 
4. August 13 was International Left-hander’s Day. Who out there is a lefty? Anyone ambidextrous?
I am left handed but have learned to be ambidextrous since to be honest the world is made for right handed people. I think that our use of the internet, keyboards, mice and smart phones have helped. The best way to tell though is how people use their cutlery. 
5. In the U.K. today is a late summer Bank Holiday. What are you doing (or did you do) with your “free” time?
Yep it was a bank holiday weekend. We went to see Allegro which is being shown here for the first time, found an Italian market over the road for some lunch. We ate wonderful tapas and we spent time trying to fix up my garden ready for my house sale later this month. Painting a fence is completed more easily if you are ambidextrous!
Bonus: Post a pic from your mobile phone that was taken in this month of August. Explain the photo…or not🙂
My favourite photo from August was this one, taken in France at the beginning of the month.

Monday, 29 August 2016

Masturbation Monday: bound and watching

It's been a while since I participated in Masturbation Monday, but since this is a very special week for this wonderful meme, I felt I should write something.

Naked but for her stockings, she is bound by her wrists and ankles to the table.
Her head rests slightly over its edge.
She can see Him. Fully clothed but for his hands, forearms and that long cock.

As He strokes himself, just out of her reach she feels the familiar throbbing in her groins.
She writhes, clenching her buttocks, pulling her pelvic floor muscles in. Intensifying the feelings of arousal.
She looks longingly at the cock she worships.

He grins at her and asks "what do you want girl?'
"your cock Master" she responds. If only her hands were free to reach for him. But if they were free, then she wouldn't be experiencing the excitement of being restrained.
He looks at her pussy, gleaming with juices.
"Do you want to cum girl?"

She very much wants to cum, but wants to feel His hands on her body. Wants that cock in her mouth.
"I do Master, but I want your cock more"
"Greedy girl" he laughs. But moves closer so she can take the cock in her hungry mouth. Gradually He pushes further into her mouth.

She begins to suck and Master groans with pleasure
The intensity of arousal in her own body increases
"Stop sucking and hold it" He instructs. She does as she is told, but finds this only increases the intensity of her desire. He pushes and she feels the tip brushing the back of her throat.

She feels his fingers exploring her labia, feels him gently pinch her clitoris, stroke around the piercing.  She concentrates on holding back, all the time her mouth filled to capacity, gagged by the thing she wants and needs to suck.

"You may cum girl" He says and almost simultaneously her body seems to explode with the orgasm. Her wrists and ankles straining against their restraints.
He allows her to continue to suck. He helps things along by stroking His own shaft too. At last He shoots His load into her hot mouth.

She has her second prize of the day.

Thursday, 25 August 2016

KOTW - Tasks

I need to get back to blogging ways, indeed if I was tasked to do so then maybe I would be better at getting my brain into gear. Even better if Master were to give me a list of topics he would like me to write about.

But seriously, this month's kink of the week is about Tasks. I have a set of rules that I agreed to when I became Master's slave, and one or two of them are kind of task orientated. Probably the main one would be that I should wear my butt plug twice a week when we are apart. I am rubbish at keeping to this rule, mainly because I forget. We often chat on Skype late in the evening and after I come off of the call I get ready for bed and am asleep before I know it.

The other rule that has slightly fallen by the wayside is the issue of underwear. I often don't wear panties but usually these days like to wear a bra. For all I am 54, my tits are still quite firm, but still I do prefer it. Generally he doesn't push the issue.

Sometimes he will give me tasks to do, but these are on an ad hoc basis, as the mood takes him (as is his prerogative). I am not someone who really needs a massive amount of structure and to be frank I am a calmer, happier human being since I have been with him.

He is someone who likes his slave to be low maintenance and so, while he likes to give me the odd thing to do, he is not really into making sure I do it. We have discussed recently that our dynamic has fallen into something of a routine and that we don't always make the effort to think about things such as this.

Perhaps this prompt may lead to further discussions on the topic since he reads what I write here and we often follow that up with a discussion.

Tasks are a good thing, but they take effort on both sides. I am willing to give it another go if he is!

Sunday, 21 August 2016

Random stuff

This weekend we have made some significant progress towards being ready to sell my house. I hired a skip and Master and I spent yesterday mainly filling it with stuff from the garden. My ex was fantastic at moving and removing things but often anything that he didn't want to put into his car and take away to the recycling centre he just dumped it into the garden. All of that stuff has been removed, along with any over hanging bush or tree. There is still time to add more stuff to the pile but already I feel closer to my final destination.

Last night I did something which in hindsight was stupid. I messaged Master's former slave to ask if she was ok. What I received, after an affirmative response was something of a rant. Apparently He lied to her, He treated her badly, He only got divorced because it is me he is with now and not her (rubbish as his ex initiated it as I had already told her). The funny thing is that while message after message came through to my phone, I was busy elsewhere. Instructed to kneel before Him and take His cock in my mouth.  It was only this morning that I read back what she had written. I have now taken her off of my Facebook and messenger and won't make the same mistake!

Kneeling at His feet last night, naked I took Master's cock in my mouth and was instructed not to suck. Holding that wonderful organ in my mouth without sucking it in was difficult. But at those moments when His control over me is paramount I tend to follow instructions to the letter.

My compliance is less so when we are apart. I have a set of rules to follow, but don't always comply. Why is that? Probably, I need that day by day attention, need to be made to focus on my role and purpose. That is just one of the reasons that I am concentrating on the job in hand, in getting myself ready to move in with Master.

Just one reason. I love the closeness we have now. I love that we can do things together.  I know that I want to be in the position that I can serve Him every day. I know that I am on the right path and Master is helping me get there.